After writing my last blog post, I took a little time to reflect.
Mainly, about how on earth I am ill. Not that it should escape us all, but I am generally very healthy. I take my multivitamin once per day, eat copious amounts of fruit and vegetables, and drink my water.
Granted, I spend a lot of time on public transport, but I feel like the above, along with my active lifestyle, should be enough to cancel it out. Surely my immune system should be robust enough to cope?
But maybe I’ve been overlooking the elephant in the room. Something that has been staring me in the face for far too long now. The fact that I want to be able to do everything. And the fact that no one’s body, no matter how healthy they are, will be able to cope with that.
It’s not a new concept, nor should it be to anyone. Why would you not want to be able to do everything? To be successful in multiple areas of your life is probably the greatest feeling of them all.
But it can’t be kept up. I am someone who wakes up early, goes to work and then runs to the gym, or goes home and writes, meal preps, has a driving lesson. I am always on the go – save for 8pm, which is my official cut off point in the day where I hide myself away in my room with Netflix and a big bowl of food. For 2 hours, before I go to sleep, it’s the one point in the day whereby I actually rest.
And for the most part, I enjoy it. I live my life via lists; in both work and my normal life. I arrange things, rearrange things, make sure I don’t forget anything, plan until there is nothing left to plan.
But in the end, it catches up with you. You cannot be superwoman (or man) for too long. And, tucked up in bed having worked from home all day and in a considerable amount of pain, I am fully aware of this fact.
It is most definitely a wake up call: I cannot be superwoman. Which is a pretty sad thought, really, because I quite like the idea of being invincible.
But, as I was told today, I am only human. I need to rest, eat, drink, and get well again. That means no rushing around, not even any gym, no lists, no stress, until I am well again. Sometimes, your body fights back against you, and that’s when you need to listen to it the most.